Stay...

Don't leave me. I know I was stupid, and I know I did you wrong. Our relationship is the most important thing in my life, and now I realize it. You are so precious. I can't believe I took you for granted, and never took advantage of you the way I should have. It makes me mad when I think about how I did you wrong, and how I managed our relationship so poorly. I wish I could make it up to you, but I know I will never have that opportunity. So we just move on...

Despite all of that, you were still so good to me. You always kept me fresh, kept me young. I seen you take a toll on some people… stress out others… but I never let you get to me like that. I mean I knew you were important, but the best moments in my life were when I didn't have to worry about you. I would always have fun, be careless, and do my own thing, because I felt like you would always be there for me. I felt like I could always make up with you at some point or another. I couldn't have been more wrong.

Going through life, I started to observe your relationship with others. It made me more conscious of how delicate our relationship was, and made me realize I needed to treat you better. Even though there were moments I would look at you, and you would make me do something I didn't want to do, I still loved you. We would be hand in hand, and then you would leave me. I knew you got around, but I always knew you would come back. I and everyone else had no choice but to kind of accept it. We all played by your rules. One moment you will be around, be abundant showing a lot of love... and then the next moment, you would be up and gone. I couldn't get mad because that's what you do.

I will never forget when you were with my friend Bradley. You two were good together! Brad was the man. Everyone loved and respected him. He was a little reckless, but aren't we all at a young age? I guess you didn't like that. After he got shot, you cheated on him. I wish you would have given him more of yourself, so he could have tried to change and make things better. That's not your style though. You were stubborn, you were cold, and you left him forever.

Tramell misses you too. When we write, he talks about you a lot. You were taken from him, and he hates that. He even fought to get you back, but unfortunately he lost. He said no amount of money, women, or anything else is in this world is worth giving up for you. I wish you and him could just have one day alone together. There is a possibility that one day you and him will re-unite, but unfortunately that day won't be for a long, long while.

As for me... you made me mature, and I thank you for that. You taught me a lot. In a way, me wasting my early experiences with you was good. It made me appreciate you, and helped shape me into who I am today. It helped me understand how to handle you, and helped me prepare for what I hope is a long future together. I know a long future together isn't promised, so you also influence me to live for the day. I realize you are everything to me. I also realize my whole existence is basically nothing to you. That's OK with me though, I have come to accept it. I try to keep up with you the best I can, even though sometimes it seems like you are flying. I'm good for now, but I know the day will come when I can't keep pace, and you will pass me by.

Time… you are of the essence. Thank you for giving some of yourself... to hear me out.

Ok that's all for now... thank you for visiting and stay tuned...